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Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Charge

I know I haven't been saying much lately. But I feel drained. Like some life force is being drained out of me....I only wish I knew where it was going.

But on the up side, the season is changing. I don't normally like the spring, due to the rain and all, but once the sun is out...Watching the children play does bring some simple joy to my dismal existence.

About the rain though.....

The power of a storm. The sound of the thunder and the flashes of lighting. It's amazing. Beautiful and destructive. Hmm, I'm sure those words could be used to describe me at some point....

There are even some grown adults that are afraid of storms. Due to some past experience with them...Something terrible must have happened to instill this in them.

Most children are terrified of them....Yet at the same time, fascinated. In spite of themselves, they have to know why storms are just that.

And still, the most amazing thing to me is...The calm after the storm. The way the pavement smell after a fresh rain...And how renewed the world seems. Even if only for a few moments.....The rain washes away all the darkness and sins of the day....

Now, it's fresh for you to reclaim.

Renewal...Isn't that what spring is all about.....

8 Comments:

At 4:23 PM, Blogger VDOFan said...

Renewal is what Spring is all about, and maybe you should start thinking about change as well. Change in your behavior, demeanor etc.. and pay for past mistakes.. so that you can have that renewal. Everyone deserves forgiveness and a 2nd chance in and at life. Believe it or not, you do too. It's up tto you though, if you want that.

hugs Janice

 
At 4:25 PM, Blogger VDOFan said...

You do deserve a chance at Happiness Nicole, like everyone else, But when you do get to be happy, you find some ways to sabotage it. Let it happen to you. and become that good person that you are trying to be.

hugs Janice

 
At 5:21 PM, Blogger The Rev. Dr. Kate said...

Perhaps what you are looking for is redemption? That takes work -and you are the one that has to do it.
Kate+

 
At 7:39 PM, Blogger Unrequited said...

I agree with the RevDrKate.

Redemption and forgiveness isn't that what we are all want.

So often we look outward for that redemption but only you know what that means for you.

If you're honest with yourself, if you really love Bobby then you know what you have to do.

But I know it will be harder than anything you've done before. And you'll have to trust not only yourself but him. And trusting in others, even someone as good as Bobby has to be as frightening as living the life you have now.

 
At 7:42 PM, Blogger VDOFan said...

Amen to what Unrequited said!

hugs janice

 
At 9:05 PM, Blogger Virginia Dare said...

you know when I was a little girl my mother used to tell me that god kept horses and that thunder was the sound of them stamping in their stalls, she was always full of stories like that.

 
At 10:30 PM, Blogger Nicole Wallace said...

Playing state the obvious.

It's my favorite game, dear ones.

 
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